New semester

Hello there small number of people of which whom are able to read these blog posts. Frankly speaking(or typing), I've lost my edge in writing. But I do feel the need to type everything I have in mind here to at least relieve myself from some of the frustration that's been holding me back from being absolutely happy.

1. 1st semester
• It was bad. I passed. But personally, I feel horrible. I think my effort's not good enough at the time. I blame no one else but myself. I even barely passed my math subject. My math subject! My mom was surprised. She knew I had potential in maths. She said it's okay and just keep up the good work. My classmates were surprised as well. Not to boast or anything, but I've been teaching them at the library during the final few weeks of the previous semester. They acknowledged my help and I really appreciated it. Hearing them get a higher grade than I did really hurt me inside.
2. Faith
• I have been going to the weekly Friday classes held by the Muslim Student Association of the University of Queensland(MSAUQ). I have no problem with that and I am indeed happy coming to those classes every week. The problem I have with is the usrahs by the Malaysian committee. Don't get me wrong. There's nothing wrong with them. It's just that recently, something happened. I don't have any grudge on anyone on the team. But I was really hurt last week. Call me selfish or whatever you want, I really couldn't hold back the tears last week. 
3. New friends
• Just because oneself is able to converse in English fluently, doesn't mean that person can mingle around easily. I've learnt well that in order to communicate efficiently, language is not everything. Yes. A fluent tongue in a main language used can be really helpful. But it's useless if you don't have the proper soft skills when talking. I admit there have been times when I've began a conversation with the locals here. But the conversation never went beyond the obvious topics like name or chosen courses. This implies to my fellow Malaysians as well.

It may sound like I'm having a really hard time here. Despite my constant complaining above, I still try to cheer myself up with certain things. I've been volunteering a number of times here for the university's Malaysian Student Association(UQMSA). Through volunteering, I've managed to get closer with the Malaysian community. I've even played frisbee with them during the weekends to get to know them better. Besides the Malaysians here, I've made friends with some of the Chinese in the nearby bubble tea shop.

All in all, I haven't collapsed yet. YET. This semester will be a lot challenging. Since my house rent is just too expensive, I've decided to take up a part time job starting after raya. With assignments and a group project to be done in 13 weeks, I really need to step up my game and manage my time really well. I'm also thinking of joining one/some of the organisations here such as UQ Malaysian Students Association (UQMSA) and Malaysian Students' Council of Australia (MASCA). With that being said, I'm really going to be needing a lot of help from a lot of people to get me going. However, this is not a Mission Impossible. I realized when I'm too free, I tend to slack off. And when I'm too busy, I tend to be more alert and precise in almost everything. That's why I'm not backing down from this decision of mine.

Once again, please do help me. Jazakallahu khair.

(I still prefer to say "Thank you" at the surau despite hearing "Jazakallahu khair" lots of times"